My opinion on relationships at uni...

For this entry, I want to discuss relationships at university, the inevitable difficulties they represent and whether they are really worth it. I have experienced the highs and lows of having a relationship at uni, but am now happier than ever, knowing that the most exciting period in my life is still to come... 

For me, uni is just a stepping stone that will provide me with a qualification to enable me to start a good career and live a fulfilling life. Although I have had a great time in Portsmouth and met some amazing people who I will always keep in touch with, it is not a lifestyle I would like to extend any further than necessary. I can't wait to finish uni and become a contributing member of society, and be in a position where I can do anything I want. 

For young people, surely the most exciting period in your life is the first few years after graduation, where you have the money and freedom to do whatever you want. You'd have a fulfilling job, a more varied social life and you'd meet so many more people. In a relationship, it can be difficult to take full advantage of that freedom, as you are rarely in a position where you can do anything you want. 

I began my (only) serious relationship when I was 15, at a period when everything in life was easy. At that age, life was just turning up for school and spending 6 hours chatting to your mates and having fun, then when you came home you'd mess about for a bit, before going home for dinner at the same time every day. Life was routine, and at that time a relationship was easy.

Once we both turned 18 and started uni, life wasn't so simple. We were no longer living in monotonous routine, but we had complete control over what we did; for the first time in our life we were free. While some of my best memories of that relationship were during the 'uni years', it was obvious that we had both changed from the 15 year olds that fell in love at school and the relationship came to an end. 

If there are people reading this who are about to embark on university life away from their girlfriend/boyfriend, I'd advise them not to have high expectations for their relationships and merely take it a step at a time. Between the ages of 18-22 people grow up so much, and often become completely different people, which is why it is the hardest period to keep a happy relationship going. 

You see some people (often girls) that have one serious relationship, then 4-5 months later are straight into another one (a 'rebound')... these people are often insecure, and only feel happy if they can rely on the constant attention of another person. If I get into a relationship with someone, I want it to be serious and won't be expecting it to end, which is why I can't relate to people who get into new relationships all the time. Surely you can remain single, and still enjoy the 'benefits' of a relationship with different people, without any commitment? 

Of course there are rare instances where people have maintained a happy relationship during the ages of 18-22, but you need to be extremely lucky to meet someone at such a young age and be so compatible that you've survived those testing years. 

Generally, it isn't natural for young people like us to tie ourselves down at a time where we have so much going on. Perhaps people feel insecure if they're single for too long, which is a shame because with a bit of self confidence and a good group of friends and family, the single life can be so much more exciting.

At a time where I've been away from home for so long, I just want to enjoy time with my mates and my family. I've had the relationship experience - which was great - but I prefer not knowing what I'm going to do tomorrow, and being able to do whatever I want, whenever I want, with whoever I want. 

As always, find me on Twitter here

Thanks again,

Sam

Diary Entry #1: Easter

Oops... I've been terribly lazy in updating this blog since my first post, so I'll make sure I try and do 1 or 2 posts a week from now on.

First and foremost thanks for reading the first post, somehow it managed to get 220+ views, and I think I only contributed to about 200 of them! Haha.

So last week, the lads from home came down to Portsmouth to enjoy what will probably turn out to be their last night in Portsmouth with me. As the Easter holidays were approaching I figured I would be spending the majority of my time working on my dissertation, so I invited them down for the Thursday and Friday.

The boys - ; Tom (@itstomcooper), Russell (@llesuRydnA),  Manners (@The_AndyManners) and Cal (@CalumJBrereton6). - seemed to have a quality time down here, and we kicked off with Thursday night at Tiger Tiger - my favourite nightclub in Portsmouth (which isn't exactly saying much!) - before a night at Liquid on Friday.

Me and the lads in Liquid looking surprisingly fresh after consecutively 'strawpedo-ing' 2 VK's  

During my first two years at Portsmouth Uni, there was a solid rivalry between it's two main nightclubs; Tiger Tiger and Liquid. Is it just me, or has this rivalry become rather one-sided? I've been to Liquid only a few times this year, and each time it seems half empty with little atmosphere. Tiger Tiger on the other hand is often packed to the rafters, with much better choice of music (always the room on the right, at the top of the stairs) and let's just say, a more attractive clientèle base! Not sure what has happened to Liquid, maybe someone can enlighten me? Does anyone actually prefer Liquid to Tiger??

On Saturday, we all went to cure our hangovers' at Big Ernie's Diner, on Albert Road, Southsea, which as the name suggests, is in the theme of a classic American Diner. Their website describes this place as a 'World Famous Diner' which I must admit is highly ambitious, considering it was half empty and even the local 118-118 woman hadn't heard of it!!

I went to Big Ernie's with one thing in mind; Big Ernie's Challenge. For those of you that don't know, the challenge consists of 1.5lb (24oz) burger, 15 onion rings, 6oz bun, whole plate of fries, a milkshake and a small ice cream dessert. It must all be eaten within 45 minutes to get it free and your picture on the 'Wall of Fame', otherwise you must pay £25. I consider myself to have a good, although occasionally excessive, appetite. Completing this challenge is an achievement, that would definitely rank up there alongside runner-up in the Year 5 Egg and Spoon Race, and getting a 'Turkey' (3 strikes in a row) down the local bowling alley, in my list of lifetime achievements.

Heart Attack on a plate: Big Ernie's Challenge

The main problem I had was that due to my current financial situation, failure was simply not an option. If I were to fail, as I did not have £25 to give them, I would suffer the incomparable embarrassment of not only failing the challenge but also not being able to pay-up! After a prolonged period of deliberation and taking on board the waitress's warning (who was unbelievably hot, by the way) that they had made the burger BIGGER, I bottled it.

The boys were all disappointed in me, I was disappointed in myself, but I'm almost certain that it would have ended me, and decided to go for the easy option of a Double Burger with Bacon and Cheese instead, which went down in record time.

Shortly after the boys went back, I also returned home for the Easter break. Being given a 3 week break from lectures at this time of year is great, but to be honest I'd be much happier with just 2 weeks and finishing Uni a week earlier in May/June!

Easter; Is it more than just chocolate?

I don't want to cause offence to any traditional Christians who may (although probably won't) read this, but Easter does not mean anything to me whatsoever. When I reminisce on this time of year throughout my childhood, all I can think of is Easter Eggs! I think I had one Easter Egg this year, which I ate a week before Easter Sunday! The only positive consequence of Easter is that I'd usually do something more family-orientated than perhaps I would on a typical Sunday.

Being at Uni you really appreciate certain home comforts. In my case, it would be; A fridge full of food, Sky HD and friends & family. Living in Portsmouth as a student I often feel that I'm living a sub-standard lifestyle, and it really makes me appreciate being at home, which I would have taken for granted if I hadn't come to Uni.

I'm back in Portsmouth now, with 2 weeks still remaining of the Easter break, but unfortunately I've got so much to do with regards to my dissertation and other coursework, that I can't afford to spend my time at home where there are too many distractions! So I'm back here in a free house all week (Project X, anyone?).

I'll only post a 'diary' entry like this every couple of weeks, I've got some other fun and interesting blog post ideas in mind until then (my next one will be about football).

Thanks for reading, if you want to get in touch find me via Twitter @samhavill or leave a comment below!

Sam

My first ever blog...

As I sit here trying to think of an epic opening line to my first ever blog, I find myself pondering over two main questions A) Will this blog achieve anything? And B) Will anyone actually read it? 

There is only one way to answer these questions; to have a go and see what happens.  Besides, you have already answered the second question for me (thanks for that). 

I'm Sam, 22 years old and currently in my final year at University of Portsmouth, UK. I study Quantity Surveying (I'll explain what that is another time) and I love a wide range of things from football, to music, to films, to eating out and so on... I love social networking (twitter: @samhavill) and you will often find me throwing horrible shapes at many sub-standard nightclubs. I'd consider myself a 'normal' 22 year old. 

Anyway, enough of all that boring stuff - why am I even writing a blog? Do I think the world will be fascinated or excited by my life? Not really. Do I have verbal diarrhoea which needs another platform in which to express itself? I don't think so!

The truth is, us students live interesting lives and it seems that all too often we are discarded from a society which assumes that because you're not working 40 hours a week, you're not important. We're branded 'tax dodgers' and often described as lazy. Don't get me wrong, I'm not out to prove anything, I just want to give an honest reflection of the student lifestyle. 

This blog will track a hugely exciting year for me personally. Once I've completed my dissertation (still just under half left to do) I'll be graduating, going to Las Vegas and then starting a graduate job in September 200 miles away from home, in Manchester, where I will have to find a new flat, new friends and build a new life. 

I want to share these life-changing experiences, as there is no doubt I will need plenty of advice from you along the way.

Most importantly however, I want to be able to look back on this period of my life when I'm older, to re-live the excitement and anticipation of what is to come. Part of me wishes that I had started a blog back in 2008 when I started Uni - I'm sure it would be pretty crazy to look back on now. 

The blog is titled 'From Poverty to Prosperity'; obviously I'm not in a state of poverty by definition (although my bank manager may tell you otherwise), I am simply one of thousands of broke students just getting by on tinned food, cheap nights out and the Student Beans website. 

Depending on how this goes, I want to continue this blog well into my employment, so you can see the transition from student life into professional life. 

I'm hoping the blog will include everything from photo's, funny stories, reviews and general observations on a wide range of topics. Think of it like an extension of twitter, if you will. 

Anyway, I think that's about enough as an introduction to the blog, I've got some dissertation stuff to be getting on with and need to make arrangements for the arrival of some VIP's who are coming to my house in the week (I will reveal all in my next blog at some point next week - with photo's!).

Thanks for reading... please give me some feedback on twitter @samhavill, so I know whether to bother doing one of these again. 

Sam